


Faint of Heart

by Insertpoetryhere



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Gen, I promise, M/M, Military related PTSD, Minor Character Death, Modern AU, PTSD, Past Sexual Abuse, Rape Recovery, it will be cute, just gotta get through the angsty moments
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-11
Updated: 2018-12-16
Packaged: 2019-09-16 15:24:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16956543
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Insertpoetryhere/pseuds/Insertpoetryhere
Summary: Adam’s attempt to get out of his shell backfires horribly after a chance encounter with Keith Kogane, his roommate’s best friend and practically adopted little brother. Now the goal is to make it through the next two weeks without Takashi ever finding out...But Adam isn’t too great at planning things through.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Yayyyy more Kadam!!!
> 
> Told you guys I was gonna take on some rare pairs after TSM.

Adam was willing to admit that staying friends with your ex fiance (as weird as it made seem) had its perks. You had a go-to roommate for when you end up renting an overpriced apartment and you already know that they don’t do their own dishes (much better than finding out a month into the arrangement). You have someone who isn’t above being honest with you… brutally honest. There was always someone to hold your hair back while you felt the consequences of a reckless night on the town and tell you how stupid you are sometimes.

But do you know what was not a plus to being friends with your ex fiance? When he feels a need to meddle in your social life.

“Ok, I’ve got the keys! You ready?” Takashi asked, walking into the living room. Adam looked up from his spot on the couch, clad in fuzzy spongebob sweatpants and an oversized white t-shirt.

“I’m not going.” Adam said plainly, picking up the remote. Takashi sighed and walked over to the couch, leaning against the back.

“You promised. You promised me, your favorite person on this planet that you would go.” He said dramatically. Adam scoffed.

“Favorite is a strong word. You’re tolerable at best.” He teased. “And besides, I never promised to go, I promised to consider it. And now I have considered it, and it’s a no. Have fun!”

Adam pressed the netflix button, but before he could find The Office and hit play (thus beginning his night of solitude), Takashi scooped the remote out of his hands and held it high above his head.

“C’mon! My friend from high school is coming, and I really want you to meet him!” Takashi whined as Adam protested, trying and failing to reach the remote.

“Please tell me this isn’t one of your super awkward ‘blind date setups’. They never end well and I always end up ubering back after half an hour!” Adam made another mad grab for the remote, but Takashi held his arm up higher. He grimaced slightly.

“Absolutely not! Gross, he’s like my little brother!” Takashi exclaimed. “No, if I was going to set him up with anybody, you’d be my last choice.”

Adam scoffed. “Hey, what’s wrong with me?” Takashi laughed a little.

“Well for starters, you still wear spongebob pajamas. Second off, your taste in TV shows is absolute shit. Need I go on, or do you get the picture?” Takashi teased him. “So what do you say, are you coming?”

Adam looked down apprehensively, still not sure. Takashi’s face softened a little.

“Listen, I think that that this will be good for both of us… considering… Well, you know.” He said carefully. Adam did know.

The screams, the bombs, the sound of gunshots. He still saw them every night, he still saw It all felt so real, yet still so far away. Like it was in a different world. 

“Ok… ok, I’ll go. But just this once.” Adam said, pulling himself up off of the couch. Takashi lit up, almost jumping up and down in excitement.

“I’ll go start the car, you get dressed!” He half yelled, running out the door. Adam rolled his eyes, going to change from the safe bagginess of his sweats into the confines of a pair of skinny jeans. 

He was definitely going to regret this.

\------

“Ok, I’m ready to go.” Adam deadpanned, heading towards the door. Takashi stuck out his arm, catching him and turning him back around in one quick motion.

“We literally just got here.” He said plainly. “C’mon, go socialize or something! Make friends, drink, just do something! You can kill a few hours at least.”

Adam rolled his eyes. “Debatable.”

He looked back over at the crowds of drunk idiots, grinding up against each other and dribbling cheap spirits down their fronts. It’s strange how he can stand in a room filled with people his own age and yet still feel like he was decades older them. He had to say, this was not his definition of fun.

“Just go!” Takashi laughed, pushing him into the thick of the group. Adam stumbled forward, but as he turned to throw his asshole roommate the bird, he saw him disappear into another crowd. No way was he going in there after him.

Adam pushed his way past drunken dancers, fighting his way out of the crowd. He felt many strangers around, pushing, moving, shoving. His breath picked up, his eyes picking up on the flashing lights. The cheers turned to screams of terror, then back again. As if his brain couldn’t decide whether it wanted him to suffer for the third time today or if this entire situation was bad enough on it’s own.

He pushed out of the crowd, breaching the wall of people and embracing the relief that came with it. The bass was pounding, not helping his racing heart slow down. He set his eyes on an empty seat of the couch, and his vision tunneled as he staggered over to it.

He plopped down unceremoniously, wondering how Takashi could even stand events like this. He decided that he would kill time by camping out on this sofa, playing games on his phone until Takashi came to get him.

Or at least that’s what he thought.

“You look like you could use a drink.” A voice said plainly. Adam looked up, seeing an outstretched hand offering him a glass of light brown liquid (It smelled like cheap drugstore whisky and sweat).

The boy sitting next to him was definitely not the type of person you’d see everyday. He had long, messy black hair that he had tied hastily out of his violet eyes with an indigo scrunchie that looked like it belonged to a preteen girl. A bright red crop top and tight leather pants did not leave much to the imagination, but rather than it looking hot it more made Adam wonder how the hell his mother had let him out of the house like that. He had a scar on his cheek that seemed to add a little bit of age to his face, but it wasn’t enough to hide the fact that this kid looked like he was 19 at most.

“I think you’ve drank enough for both of us.” Adam pointed out, gesturing towards the pile of crushed beer cans and empty plastic cups that sat in front of him. The stranger shook his head.

“Nah, those aren’t all mine. This is just a popular dumping ground.” He gave out a little laugh. “I may have a high tolerance, but it’s not that high.”

“You shouldn’t have any tolerance.” Adam mumbled, taking a sip of his drink. “How old are you? 17?”

The stranger scowled. “I’m 24, actually. You?”

Adam found that hard to believe, but figured it wasn’t his place to card some kid who was just trying to have some fun.

“26. So what are you doing at a place like this anyway?” Adam asked. The boy shifted uncomfortably.

“I was supposed to meet a friend here… But I haven’t seen him.” He answered. Adam felt that on a personal level, seeing as he had absolutely no idea where his ride was either.

“So why aren’t you out there partying?” Adam asked. Seemed strange that this kid would go through all the trouble to bust into a college grad school party and not even you know… party.

He shrugged. “I’m finding out that you meet more interesting people off to the sides… I mean, that’s why I’m talking to you isn’t it?” He admitted with a smirk. Adam ignored the obvious suggestive undertone to that statement as he stuck out his hand.

“I’m Adam.” He said, shaking the kid’s hand. He must have introduced himself too, but the music drowned it out. Adam didn’t see the point in asking him to repeat it.

“Well Adam,” He lifted up his half full glass. “Care to indulge me in a few more drinks?”

Adam shrugged and raised his glass too. What else did he have to do?

\-------

One drink turned into 3. Then 7. Then 16.

After that, Adam lost count.

The hours started to blur by, things happening too fast for him to process the memories. 

He remembered talking, the feeling of something warm and soft exploring his mouth, the feeling of some pressure on his lap, and the sound of a door slamming shut.

He woke up in a hotel room, in a Holiday Inn just off the interstate.

Adam’s head was spinning as he pulled himself up from the soft pillows. He didn’t dare to open his eyes, knowing that doing so would probably cause him to scream. God, how much did he drink last night?

He reached over to grab his phone, which he always kept plugged in on the left side of his bed. But instead of feeling the smooth plastic of his phone case, Adam felt something soft and warm underneath his fingertips.

… Oh god please no.

The person beneath his hand stirred slightly, letting out an exhausted moan.

No no no no no.

Adam dared to open one eye, peering over to the person sleeping next to him. His back hair was strewn everywhere, covering his face with an inky curtain. Despite this, Adam knew exactly who it was laying next to him.

He jumped back, almost falling off of the bed as he scrambled away. This couldn’t be happening!

“Ok Adam, just breathe!” He whispered to himself. This was the part where a responsible adult would just wait for the other person to wake up and calmly explain to them what had happened. Just chalk it up to drunken stupidity and go on with his life…

But Adam was not a responsible adult.

He scrambled to grab his pants and shirt off of the ground, pulling them on along with the rest of his clothes and bolting.

What this kid didn’t know couldn’t hurt him.

\------

“Why the hell have you not been answering my calls?” Takashi yelled from the other side of the phone. Adam winced as he sipped his coffee, carefully trying to nurse his hangover.

“I know, I know! I’m sorry, ok? I just got a little preoccupied…” He spared Takashi the details, taking another long sip of his drink.

“Just… next time text me at least?” He sighed. Adam gave a hum of affirmation, sticking his hands in his pockets and looking for his keys.

“So did you find your friend last night?” Adam asked. Takashi paused for a moment.

“No, but he did show up at our door about a half an hour ago…” He said. “He had a pretty rough night.”

Adam scoffed. “Him and I both.” He huffed, giving up on his search as he approached the door to his apartment building. “Hey, I’m at the door and I don’t have my keys. Buzz me in?”

“Already on it.” Takashi said. Not a second later, Adam heard the door unlock with a click. He smiled and tugged it open.

“Thanks man, see you in a sec.” He hung up the phone, sighing as he passed the broken elevator and headed straight toward the stairs. It was moments like this where he was really glad that he lived on the second floor.

He was looking forward to hopping into the shower and washing the previous night clean away. It definitely wasn’t one of his proudest moments, and he was looking forward to forgetting it had ever happened.

But of course the universe wasn’t going to just let him cut his losses without facing some consequences.

“You look like shit.” Takashi greeted him as he stepped through the front door.

“A beacon of positivity, as always” Adam muttered sarcastically. “I’m gonna shower.”

“Before you go back to being a complete hermit, I’d like for you to meet someone!” Takashi said, far too excited for this time of day (10:30 A.M…. far too early). Adam held back a groan, finally looking away from the tan shag carpeting under his feet and up at the person sitting next to his roommate on the couch.

His dark hair was thrown back in a bun.

His thin face looked young, even with the scar that ran down his cheek.

His big, violet eyes looked up at him, wide with recognition.

No fucking way…

“Adam, this is Keith!” Takashi smiled, looking between the two of them completely unaware.

… Shit.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Conversations need to be had.

Adam was practically sweating buckets as he sat on the armchair adjacent to the couch. Takashi and Keith carried on with their conversation. So far, Keith didn’t seem to remember much about last night. He remembers them talking, them drinking, but luckily not them sleeping together…

Something about the way he was phrasing that in his head made him feel gross.

“Yeah, I’m surprised that Adam was willing to talk to someone!” Takashi joked. “I half expected him to sit there and pout the entire time.”

Adam rolled his eyes, pretending that this wasn’t exactly what he intended to do. 

“Don’t suppose you saw whoever he left with though?” Takashi laughed, not even beginning to understand why he shouldn’t say that. Adam froze up, hoping to god that this wouldn’t trigger some memory for Keith.

“Takashi!” He hissed. His stupid roommate smiled innocently.

“All I’m saying is that I’d love to meet the metaphorical snake charmer that managed to get you to loosen up.” Takashi defended himself, throwing his hands up in mock surrender. 

Keith laughed, but shrugged in response. “Nope, can’t say I did.”

Thank the lord.

Takashi smiled, but it died pretty quickly once he checked his watch.

“Shit, Econ starts in like ten minutes!” He jumped up out of his seat. “Um, I have a class to get to. You good just chilling here?”

Keith nodded. “Yeah it’s completely fine! Adam and I never really got to finish our conversation at the party anyway.”

He turned to Adam, smiling at him warmly. Adam tried to smile back with the same energy, but he ended looking more like a nervous baby seal.

“Well, uh… great!” Takashi looked off-put by Keith’s demeanor and eyed the two suspiciously. If he had figured anything out, he didn’t say anything. “Have fun!”

Adam shifted his eyes from Keith’s face to his feet as he waited for the door close. He tried to think of something to say, something funny about politics or a comment about the weather. Anything to ease his nerves. But before he could, Keith cleared his throat to get his attention.

“So… do you normally pull a ‘hit and run’, or am I just special?” Keith asked. Adam felt his face heat up, and he jerked his head up almost fast enough to give himself whiplash.

“I-I can explain!” He stuttered. But something was off… was Keith smiling?

“Relax, it’s fine…” He said gently. The two of them probably could have just left it at that if it wasn’t for Adam’s last two brain cells deciding to fire off way too late.

“I wouldn’t have done it if I knew who you were!” He almost shouted. Keith’s posture straightened and his smile fell.

“If you knew who I was?” He asked, eyebrows knit in confusion. Adam suddenly realized how insulting that sounded.

“No, not like that!” He corrected, resisting the urge to smack himself upside the head. “I mean… you know… you’re Takashi’s Keith!”

Something in Keith’s eyes lit up.

“You’re like his little brother, I would have never… you know… done that with his little brother!” Adam continued.

And whatever lit up was gone.

“It’s… it’s ok. I get it.” Keith said plainly, leaning back against the couch and sighing. “So what do we do now?”

Adam bit the inside of his cheek. “Honestly not sure… Did you tell-?”

“Shiro? No. I didn’t tell him.” Keith laughed to himself dryly. There was a slight uncertainty in his voice. “That probably wouldn’t end well. No, he thinks I’m just slightly hungover.”

“And that’s his definition of a ‘rough night’?” Adam asked. And Takashi said Adam was the one who didn’t do much…

Keith shrugged. “I guess it really only applies when he’s talking about his little brother.”

Adam tried to ignore the slightly bitter twinge in Keith’s voice.

“So we just have to worry about him never finding out?” Adam asked. Keith nodded.

“Won’t be hard. I’m only here for my winter break.” Keith added. “That’s only 3 weeks. And it’s not like I’ll be staying with you guys.”

Adam nodded. “So we just need to keep it on the down low. You know, friendly but not too friendly.”

Keith grimaced a little. “I feel kinda bad about this… Shiro and I have never really kept secrets.”

“Well to be entirely honest, it’s not really your head that’s on the line.” Adam pointed out. “Besides, it’s not like we’re lying to him… we just aren’t telling him something.”

Keith raised an eyebrow. “That is a lie. It’s a lie by omission.”

“But we aren’t telling a lie, per se?” Adam tried to justify it, but there really wasn’t a way to make this sound good. “Speaking of which… last night you said you were 24… was that…?”

“A lie?” Keith finished his sentence. “Well… yes?”

Adam felt his blood run cold. Fuck.

“I’m actually 22. I just thought that if I told you my real age you wouldn’t talk to me.” Keith looked down at his hands, which sat folded in his lap.

Adam tried his best to hide his sigh of relief. 22 wasn’t going to get him a felony charge and immediately label him as a sex offender. He stood by the fact that he would have never even looked at Keith in that light if he had been sober, but it did make him feel better that Keith had at least been in his 20’s...

God, these inner monologues made him sound like a creep.

Adam took a deep breath, looking over at Keith (who was clearly trying to ignore that he was in the room with him).

He was never drinking again.

\--------

Takashi returned from his classes a few hours later, joining the two in the living room and chatting with them until at least 11 o’clock. 

Keith and Adam had done pretty good at looking like they had been carrying on a friendly conversation the entire time. Takashi didn’t seem to suspect anything, and despite the slightly tense atmosphere he, Keith, and Adam managed to carry on as you’d expect from three completely platonic friends who had never once had a drunken one night stand.

Adam wanted to scream in relief as Keith said his goodbyes to them, running down to meet up with his uber. It’s not like Keith wasn’t a cool guy… it’s just that Adam was pretty confident that both of them would be more comfortable if they saw each other as little as possible over the next few weeks.

Takashi sighed, leaning against the door frame. “Is it bad if I say that I’m glad today’s over?”

Adam looked up, a little shocked. “What do you mean?”

“I just… it felt a little tense.” He said in full honestly. His hand moved up to his shoulder, tracing where his prosthetic met his flesh. “I think I know why…”

“Didn’t he already know about that?” Adam asked. Takashi shifted awkwardly.

“To be honest, there’s a lot of stuff I didn’t tell him about…” He scratched the back of his neck. “My arm, the nightmares… you.”

Adam nodded. ‘We don’t keep secrets’, huh?

But he honestly felt better knowing that there was a lot Takashi didn’t tell Keith about Adam. It made him feel less deceptive about keeping what happened between him and Keith to himself.

“Don’t worry.” He assured his friend. “I’m 100% sure that it wasn’t you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I did change the title. I’m sorry.

**Author's Note:**

> So I feel like I should say this.  
> Keith is not 17.  
> Adam is not a felon.  
> Keith is in fact 24.  
> And they were both drunk off their asses.  
> No rape glorification in this household.  
> I ain’t about that life, so I’m gonna put it out there now. I would never write a story where a victim actually falls for their abuser and try to pass it off as romance.


End file.
